Monday, September 15, 2008

Basic trouble-shooting list :)

1. check the event log
2. google it
3. reboot
4. run iisreset
5. empty the recycle bin
6. hit ctrl+break
7. kill the aspnet worker process
8. clear temporary internet files
9. touch the config file
10. degauss the monitor
11. remove everything from the startup folder
12. "get latest" and rebuild
13. login as admin
14. run ipconfig /renew
15. check if capslock is on.
16. run a virus scan
17. download the latest CTP
18. disable and then re-enable the network interface
19. restart services (some/most/all)
20. change your password
21. unplug your router, and leave it unplugged for 10 seconds before plugging it back in
22. clear your cookies
23. add current site to your trusted zone
24. disable javascript
25. try to ping the server
26. press 'clean solution' from the context menu in the solution explorer
27. repair the installation
28. run large magnets over all hard drives
29. check the network cable
30. defrag the hard drive
31. try it in a different browser
32. run a spyware scan
33. minimize all windows and check for a modal dialog
34. ensure configuration is correct
35. see what has changed recently
36. run process monitor
37. run chkdsk /v
38. revert all checkins from anyone named 'Gazza'
39. run the windows update service
40. remove and then recreate all Bluetooth partnerships
41. do a hardware reset on your mobile device
42. decompile + monkey punch + duck slap + donkey whack
43. what would jesus do?
44. look for suitable workarounds
45. re-calibrate your Geiger counter
46. check for packet storms
47. best to rule out toxicological contamination early on
48. describe the problem in terms even a child can understand
49. apply duct tape
50. increase the timeout duration
51. increase the maximum threadpool size
52. write to your local minister or government representative
53. try using the Microsoft Online Crash Analysis to submit your crash dump bucket-id
54. disable the customer experience improvement program
55. eat liver of sacred monkey
56. import the decryption certificate to the local client certificate store
57. ensure sql server is setup for mixed mode authentication
58. bypass proxy server for local addresses
59. check the hosts file and the routing tables
60. use filemon to locate any other log files being accessed
61. check the bios
62. update the device drivers for all peripherals
63. attach a debugger, get a memory dump, look at it in a hex reader and post it to a forum
64. cleanse all user inputs
65. put a try catch around it
66. replace the batteries in your wireless mouse and keyboard
67. recompile all dll's
68. uninstall the old version, re- install the new version, apply hot fixes patches and upgrades
69. remove the case from your computer, and aim a fan at it
70. check that you haven't been blacklisted
71. run diagnostic checks on surge protection units
72. add an index
73. remove an index
74. recalculate indexes
75. ensure ftp uses passive mode
76. recalculate statistics
77. reboot in safe mode
78. check kerberos delegation
79. review query plan
80. if 'automatically detect settings' is checked/unchecked, then uncheck/check it
81. kill rogue processes in task manager
82. run memtest.exe
83. boot from your emergency repair disks
84. follow standard knoppix data recovery procedures
85. tweak-UI
86. uninstall adobe pdf reader
87. insert "Debug.WriteLine("up to line 53");" where appropriate
88. set tracelevel to verbose
89. flush buffers
90. % truss -t \!all -t open a.out
91. use cdb or windbg. add in SOS for clr issues.
92. field test any lightning protection devices
93. use a temperature gauge on all hardware components, and compare against safe operating limits from manufacturer
94. run it inside a VM
95. check the DPI.
96. search the knowledge base
97. enable javascript debugging
98. turn off friendly http error messages in IE
99. set the current culture to en-US
100. attach a multi-meter
101. roll back to your most recent backup
102. check for GC pressure
103. empty the MSI cache
104. temporarily allow popups
105. look in your spam folder
106. recompile. wait. recompile.
107. turn off windows firewall
108. run caspol and give everything full trust
109. put yourself in the shoes of the program itself. if you were the program, what would you do?
110. ask hanselman
111. try wireshark. failing that, try fiddler. what does tracert show?
112. check the blueprints and read over the uml.
113. implement the retry pattern.
114. rtfm
115. delete the bios
116. attach anti-static wrist strap on every appendage
117. it inside a faraday cage
118. insert "alert('here');" where appropriate
119. overwrite every byte in memory the standard five times as pre-scribed by nsa guidelines
120. reinstall the operating system from the original media provided by the supplier
121. add a lock statement
122. blame Irwin the intern
123. blame the guy who left last week
124. blame the ESL guy
125. blame DNS
126. add a sleep statement
127. apply a fudge factor.
128. run a spell checker over your code
129. light some candles. sacrifice chicken.
130. set all DWORD's to 0 in the registry. Then delete the registry
131. drop all databases.
132. unregister and re-register all dlls
133. reboot 3 times
134. drink own urine
135. run prime95 overnight
136. recompile the kernel
137. do the packets hop subdomains, and if so does NAS require a NAS forwarding service -- how about VLAN?
138. track down the original programmers who wrote the system, apply percussive trauma therapy.
139. uninstall java
140. underclock it
141. ignore it
142. post a request for comment on theDailyWTF
143. ask for correlating evidence that the problem even exists
144. sharpen your wooden stakes before proceeding any further
145. melt silver crucifixes onto tips of all bullets
146. fill your water bottle with holy water
147. call tech support
148. check when daylight savings begins
149. simmer ground rhino horn on a bed of whale pancreas
150. plan and enact your fire evacuation plan
151. bathe in holy water
152. increase dosage on all medications. check for interactions.
153. bury heart of an ox at midnight under crossroads on fullmoon
154. clean up your desk
155. check that pump's suction pipe is elevated above bottom of pond. (Float the inlet 18 to 24 inches below the water surface)
156. wear shoes with six inch cork soles
157. wear raincoat, goggles, breathing apparatus
158. climb into an anti static bag
159. always use a condom
160. check pressure reading on gauges number 1 and 2
161. run it through an oscilloscope
162. check your immunization schedule is up to date
163. check for seismic/tectonic activity, solar flares, tsunami, meteor showers.
164. go and get a coffee. come back and look at it with a fresh set of eyes.